Too much to ask?

[lexin]

I spent some time this lunchtime clicking through the options on buying sewing patterns. Hush, those of you who (justifiably) point out that I have a box of sewing patterns as yet unsewn. You can't have too many.

Or, perhaps you can take heart; it seems that even if a fat bird chooses to make her own clothes, there are few options. Perhaps it's me being too optimistic, but all that I could find seemed to be a variation on 'sack, tied up with string'.

Pull on trousers, yes. I can understand that women of more corpulent dimensions prefer not to do battle with zips on a daily basis. In general, I prefer that option myself. Still worse is that variation known as the 'side zip'. Preserve us, please, from the evil of the side zip – the last thing I want in the morning is to have to tie my arms in knots to get the zip to fasten. (And has anyone but me ever had one of those frocks where the zip is under the arm? Nightmare! I just don't have the spoons for that at any time.)

Having said that, why is it not possible to get frocks with swishy skirts for larger women? Why are we condemned to pencil or A-line skirts? It's not as if they make us look any less fat.

And that's the crux of it; I'm fat, I'm going to have to clothe a fat body. I've noticed this. But I don't want clothe it in variations on a sack. I can't make it look thinner (I don't believe your 'slimming cut' bollocks, I've been had by that before) but I want it to look shapely and interesting. Is it too much to ask?

Comments

[sollers]

Side zips: OMG did you have to remind me of the time when ALL women's trousers had them? They were the bane of my existence.

[lexin]

They are evil. Evil McEvil of the Evil clan. Especially in plaid.

[sollers]

*remembers, shudders, and takes another slug of Sloe Gin*

[amberfox]

Ack. I had managed to forget those. Thank you for reminding me. =/ With skirts, I can do the zipper first and then turn it around, but pants don't really have that option.

[lexin]

I have one pair with a side zip, and I never wear them because I just can't face the contortions necessary. Awful things.

[lyorn]

They were the bane of my existence.

My mother told a story about being sent home from here place of work, not because she wore jeans, but because she wore (distant sounds of western civilisation crumbling) front-zipped jeans. The horror!

[lexin]

A friend of mine at university attended a 'ladies college' and was once sent home for wearing the "wrong knickers". That's one strict uniform they had there.

[lyorn]

I have a dress which zips on the side. Which is actually worse than zipping on the back, because the contortions needed to reach the zipper make it near-impossible to close it. I'll have to remember to always carry a safety pin and a piece of string when I wear that dress, so I can close that stupid zipper.

[lexin]

Oh! I've got one of those, too. Yes, a piece of string and a safety pin in the purse is a necessary adjunct.